I read a post over on And Then We Saved about Gwyneth Paltrow’s website Goop being in debt. Well, not debt per se.

Actually, we don’t like to use the word ‘debt’; it’s too traumatic and sounds low-class. Instead, we use the term ‘financially overleveraged’, which means that technically the money we have is not currently present in a tangible sense, but that we know we have money and are extremely secure in a spiritual understanding of finance.

This comes from a very snarky (by which I mean spot-on) piece on the subject. Apparently, Goop is $1.2 million in “financial overleveraging.” Which I’m sure has nothing to do with the attitudes that let both Gwyneth and the CEO taking 80,000 GBP (or about $135,000) each in personal loans. Interest free. Oh, and they’ve paid back a total of 13,000 GBP. By which I mean the CEO has paid back 13,000 GBP.

You’d think Gwyneth could pay it back with some of that money she got from being intermittently annoying on Glee. But maybe those funds are going toward her “conscious uncoupling” with her husband. I’m still gagging on that one, but hey, maybe kids of “conscious uncoupling” are more well-adjusted  than kids of divorce.

Let’s face it, Gwyneth has been pretentious off and on throughout the years. If you don’t believe me, go to this slideshow of her most obnoxious quotes over the years.  These include such favorites as “I’d rather die than let my kids eat Cup-a-Soup.” and “I am who I am. I can’t pretend to be someone who makes $25,000 a year.” Although if she could, she wouldn’t have needed that loan.

But moving past all of her snobbery and, frankly, sociological ignorance, we’re left with what technically shouldn’t be a surprise: A celebrity that can’t handle money. Of course, Goop is separate from her own accounts. Then again, she felt the need to take a rather large loan. So apparently her finances aren’t perfect either.

I think what rankles most people is that she thinks debt sounds “low class.” (Although, I’m not sure where she gets that attitude, given the number of stars in financial straits over the years.) And that does piss me off. And the idea that the money is there, just not in a tangible sense sounds like something out of a Terry Pratchett book.

Also,  they clearly don’t have a secure understanding of finance — be it spiritual or secular. Or they wouldn’t have let this happen. Besides which, there’s no such thing as a “spiritual understanding of finance.” Money isn’t religious. And if it is, there’s something seriously wrong with your outlook on life. Or maybe she likes to use the word “spiritual” to mean intangible, abstract or any other word that means “just not bloody there.”

But the word that really hit me here was “traumatic.” Sorry lady, but debt is traumatic. It hangs over your head. It nags at your brain at random hours of the day. But it can also make you change the way you live your life. Dealing with debt can help you live a more purposeful existence –  if you let it.

Instead, she walls herself off from unpleasant experiences by couching them in flowery terms. It’s unrealistic, and it’s an affront to those of us who actually put in the effort to deal with life’s unpleasantries. Contrary to what she may think, she isn’t above it all. She’s just in denial. And I know from denial: I’ve suffered through PTSD. Wall off all you want, reality seeps through the cracks, expands and makes the dam crumble.

Then you find yourself, divorced, in debt and with some kids that are probably dying to try Cup-a-Soup.

 

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