But it’s not the third time.

We just got back from the early ultrasound. The fetus is around the 6th week instead of the 7th and there’s no heartbeat discernible.

So far no physical miscarriage, which is a mixed blessing. It means I probably have to have another D&C, which was horrible last time and I had to pay $150 for the experience. But if we do a D&C, they’ll be able to collect tissue and send it off for analysis.

I’ve called my supervisor at work, and she’s taking over for me today. I’m sure for a few days if I really need it. But I may need the distraction, so we’ll take it as it comes.

Anyway, hopefully the implication is obvious but I probably won’t be posting for a few days.

Tim’s trying to get me to go get something to eat, which is the sensible thing to do. But I do hate crying in public so… we’ll see.

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May 18, 2013 at 10:44 am

{ 32 comments… read them below or add one }

1 Linda January 3, 2013 at 1:25 pm

I'm so sorry for your loss. Be kind to yourself and do what you need to work through your grief.

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2 Luke January 3, 2013 at 1:34 pm

What sad news. I'm sorry for your loss.

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3 Dawn January 3, 2013 at 1:41 pm

I am so, so, so sorry for your loss.

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4 Christina January 3, 2013 at 2:00 pm

I am very sorry for your loss. If your OB hasn't already, you should be referred to a reproductive endocrinologist or a reproductive immunologist after a 3rd miscarriage. Obviously, no one wants to go through that heartbreak three times, but the silver lining is that three is the magic number to run a full barrage of tests. There are tons of things like clotting disorders that can cause multiple miscarriages and are treatable once diagnosed. I've never had to have a D&C but six weeks is usually early enough to wait for things to happen naturally as long as you and your doctor are comfortable with that. Again, very sorry.

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5 Catseye January 3, 2013 at 3:01 pm

Abby, I'm so sorry to hear this sad news.

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6 jolie January 3, 2013 at 6:07 pm

so sad. hugsss

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7 Lisa January 3, 2013 at 6:34 pm

I'm so sorry for you and Tim.

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8 Marcia January 3, 2013 at 7:07 pm

I am so sorry Abby.

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9 Joyce January 3, 2013 at 7:09 pm

Oh sugar! (I'm a grandma, let me call you this just one time). I'm so sorry. You're so brave. Please take care of yourself. We will be thinking of you and Tim.

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10 Jackie January 3, 2013 at 7:38 pm

I'm so sorry. I've been where you are and know the range of emotions you must be feeling. But the fourth time was a charm for us…as was the fifth. Please take care of yourself….you'll be in my thoughts.

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11 Ro in San Diego January 3, 2013 at 8:33 pm

Condolences. Miscarriages are heart breaking. You will be in my prayers.

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12 Sonya Ann January 3, 2013 at 9:58 pm

I'm crying for you, honey. I'm so sorry.

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13 judy January 4, 2013 at 12:26 am

I am so sorry. You are in my family prayers.

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14 Cynthia January 4, 2013 at 7:03 am

I am so very sorry.

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15 take_flight January 4, 2013 at 8:41 am

I very sorry Abby.

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16 Sherie January 4, 2013 at 8:49 am

Sorry you are having to go through this.

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17 Petunia 100 January 4, 2013 at 10:47 am

Oh, I am so sorry. My condolences to both you and Tim.

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18 Alane January 4, 2013 at 12:31 pm

Damn Abby I am so very sorry for your loss. You and Tim are in my thoughts.

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19 lifeisfullofsunnydays January 4, 2013 at 9:15 pm

{{{hugs}}}

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20 nancy January 5, 2013 at 11:33 am

I'm so sorry, for you and Tim, your mom, and your inlaws.

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21 jestjack January 6, 2013 at 8:12 am

So sorry….to start the new year like this….sheeezz…Your "wit and wisdom" will be missed. Best of luck in your recovery…..

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22 Sandra J January 6, 2013 at 6:19 pm

So sorry to hear this, for you and all of your family.

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23 Deedee January 6, 2013 at 8:04 pm

Oh such sad news. I am so very sorry and wishing only the very best for you and Tim and your family in 2013.

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24 debtandthegirl January 7, 2013 at 6:52 am

My deepest condolences. I hope you are able to get though this difficult time.

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25 Susan January 7, 2013 at 5:05 pm

Your heartbreak is felt among us all – please take comfort in knowing we ache for you.

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26 Cathy R January 9, 2013 at 2:12 pm

I am so sorry for you and your family.

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27 Casey January 10, 2013 at 6:21 am

I'm so sorry for your loss. I've been there myself and with infertility issues too. Please have your doctor check your progesterone levels. I always miscarried at 6 or 7 weeks. I just happened to talk to someone that had the same issue and it turns out her progesterone level would measure fine early in the pregnancy but they determined that for some reason it would suddenly drop and cause her to have a miscarriage. My first pregnancy was successful, but I was on progesterone suppositories for the first trimester. I had two miscarriages after that but I wasn't on the progesterone. After talking to this woman that had the progesterone issue, I insisted on going on the progesterone for my fourth pregnancy and lo and behold I was able to carry to term. I'm convinced it was the progesterone suppositories that I needed to carry through to full term. My doctor didn't really buy that my levels would drop, but he said it wouldn't hurt to go on the suppositories so he let me do it. I'm glad he did. Please take care of yourself and get plenty of rest.

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28 Emily Guy BIrken January 10, 2013 at 1:34 pm

I'm so sorry. Take good care of yourself and know that you have a big community online rallying around you.

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29 og3 January 10, 2013 at 4:48 pm

I'm so sorry to hear this. Once you get your bearings, definitely look into testing. Many things can cause miscarriages but with testing, hopefully they can find some answers and work to prevent it. Again, so sorry for your loss.

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30 John January 11, 2013 at 1:56 pm

My deepest condolences to you. The heartache that goes along with this is awful. My aunt had five miscarriages before giving birth to a healthy baby boy — my cousin. He now has two boys of his own.

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31 Sarha L January 11, 2013 at 8:50 pm

I am so, so sorry.

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32 practical parsimony January 13, 2013 at 7:08 pm

So sorry!

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