Some of you seemed to miss the point of the last post.
There were people who thought I was demonizing the Frugalwoods — or at least disregarding them — because of their surprisingly high income. Not true. I used the Frugalwoods merely as a touchstone to explore the deeper issue of finanial inspiration porn.
The point of my last piece wasn’t saying that the Frugalwoods themselves are the problem (or that all of their advice should be ignored). The real problem, as with all inspiration porn, is how they’ve been portrayed by the media.*
The media — even social media — sensationalizes success stories whether that’s they paying off debt, going from rags to riches or disabled-person-climbs-Mt.-Everest. These stories condense long, often nuanced narratives into one-note triumphs by two-dimensional characters. They make epic parts of people’s lives into soundbites: spots of fuzzy feel-goodness in between dire reports of the latest tragedy and the discovery of some ubiquitous chemical that’s probably killing you.
The media’s generally superficial coverage of accomplishments omits far too many details about the privileges the person had. Instead, the person is held up as (you guessed it) inspiration. An “If they can do it, anyone can” story.
Again, it reduces real people with real stories into poster children. These are people who have gone — and are often still going through — range of experiences and emotions. The trials and tribulations, the steps backward as well as forward… It all gets collapsed into a cheesy, glib portrayal. Anything that doesn’t fit within the boundaries of “uplifting” gets trimmed away like so many sandwich crust.
As if this reduction weren’t frustrating and insulting enough, it seeps into the brains of viewers/readers/Facebook-ers creating biases and unrealistic expectations. Thanks to that, disabled people are expected to be chipper and constantly trying to surpass very real limitations — all because one too many parathletes with gung-ho attitudes are featured in news stories.
Similarly, people know that anyone who hasn’t managed to pay off a zillion dollars of debt in 18 months, anyone who hasn’t saved enough for financial independence… That’s just a failure of will. It’s not that expenses can only be trimmed so far back; it’s not that some people have jobs that just don’t pay that well (some of whom, like many teachers, wouldn’t trade careers for a better salary). No, it’s that these folks lack determination.
And if you’re actually poor? Well, then it’s definitely a personal failing. Not low-paying jobs, not unavoidable life expenses — nothing but a dearth of determination and a clear disinterest in bettering yourself.
This is frustrating, maddening even, but it’s also detrimental to the populace that buys into the hype. It’s a way that the real world has been warped for them.
So no, the problem people have with inspiration porn (financial or otherwise) isn’t the successes themselves; it’s how they’re framed.
I’m happy for the Frugalwoods. I’m happy that their blog has helped so many people. But the depiction of their story, the fact that no journalist seems to have researched or insisted on knowing their salaries (which would, of course, have taken some of the inspiration-y edge of the tale) — that has real implications for people struggling to save money; and that I take issue with.
*Arguably, it sounds as though they did make the book a little inspiration porn-y, but they were emulating what the media had already done… Because clearly it worked well.
RoInRocketCityAlabama says
My parents were disabled and struggled constantly in many ways. Their struggles left an indelible mark on me. Everything was more difficult for us. The cards were definitely stacked against us, and life knocked us around a lot. I like life stories that inspire hope. Without hope those living through difficulties might decide to just give up, like my parents did for many years. They were inspired by another couple to leave their bad situation to move across country. I’m for inspiration anywhere I can find it. No situations are ever one size fits all. During this time period they were happier than I’d ever seen them because they had a common goal. My dad died a few years later but his final years were happy as a result of stepping outside his comfort zone.
jestjack says
I disagree….Your followers got the point loud and clear…..”Your mileage may vary”….It would have changed my perspective on the Frugalwoods Blog if I’d have known that they were making 6 figures while the “painted picture” on the blog was of a struggling young couple trying to reach their goal while working for “non-profits”… IMHO even more troubling is that a brand was built on this thought WITH a book… I found your post insightful, educational and spot on…. Thanks once more….
Heidi says
I agree. The problem I have with the Frugalwoods is that they continually mention their work for non-profits so as to imply a modest income.
Catseye says
I understood what you said and I agree with jestjack, the majority of your readers understood you just fine. I had never heard of the Frugalwoods until you mentioned them but if they are FIRE bloggers, I doubt they’d appeal to me anyway. I’m just too “lazy” to work towards early retirement. ;o)
Yet Another PF Blog says
I wish the Frugalwoods had been somewhat more transparent about their level of income in the blog and book. Framing their story exclusively as one of frugality feels disingenuous. Even a bit irresponsible. (Though probably a good marketing decision.) Like you say, folks with normal incomes modeling their lives after the FWs will find lifelong and necessary frugality more frustrating than high income earners cutting back for a couple years. Others who drink the Kool-Aid will be quick to criticize on failures (“Why can’t you retire early? MMM and Frugalwoods did it!”).
All that said, I can’t tell whether these sorts of portrayals are more harmful than hurtful on the whole. Some end up being greatly inspired by the message and get nudged in the right direction, including readers who would have been alienated and not been drawn in my the book/blog/message of frugality had the income stuff been more up front. If that was their introduction to internalizing frugality, they are still better off for having been drawn in. Other readers are worse off for having internalized impossible standards. I guess the questions is: what is the balance between the two camps, and what is the magnitude of the impact on each.
FrugalStrong says
I understood what you were trying say but still personally feel that people relying on media, social media, etc for inspiration and motivation is an issue. Those things have always been and always will be “sound bites.” You get the highlights of a “feel good story” and the “worst parts” of a bad one. Why? Because attention spans are short and no one really cares to read the plethora of minute details that make up the reality.
I look at it like this – one needs to find their own inspiration and motivation from within. And even then, it’s not even about that – it’s about being disciplined and creating a habit to help you through when motivation has left the building. I think it’s ridiculous that people are constantly looking to others to somehow magically motivate them to change whatever it is they want to change, then complaining when not all the details easily translate to their own life. The purpose of these”soundbite stories” are to generate interest. If someone’s curiosity is sparked, they can search for more info on that & similar topics to see how it might best apply to their personal and UNIQUE situation.
K says
I look to websites or bloggers sometimes for inspiration, but I use people I know personally to motivate me as well.
My in laws were immigrants and my FIL worked 6am-10pm every day and learned a trade, and they also had 2-3 mortgages on their home.
They only spent money on healthy food and that’s it. They paid off their home in 10 years and were able to build a life for themselves, both eventually working until age 62-65. Never making a large income by today’s standards but they retired very comfortably and have been able to be very generous with our family and my SIL’s family.
They are a huge source of inspiration to me, not knowing any English and making a good life for themselves and their children. And my husband and SIL in turn are some of the hardest working people I know.
I do wish the Frugalwoods had disclosed their income sooner though because it would have allowed more transparency.
Cindy Brick says
Just a gentle mention — the Frugalwoods DID come from a poor start. They may be making more now, but they didn’t start that way, as college students or young marrieds. I probably noticed this more because we started out the same way — in university housing full of non-Americans (many of whom became our good friends, but we were all mostly broke). Our downstairs neighbor, from Thailand, thanks to collecting and never rinsing out his pop bottles, had a cockroach population the size of Cleveland. When they got sick of pop, they just moved upstairs to our apartment. I was forever cleaning and fumigating, to try and get rid of the little buggers. Ewwww.
I put a link in the comments section of the last post to the “Before we were Frugalwoods” post…which explains a LOT, including how they were able to start saving on a starvation income. They’re just following the principles today that they started back then, when they barely had two nickels to rub together. That’s what the media should be pointing out — and how their methods can help us, whether we consider ourselves rich or poor.
Abbie, you made a good point here, though — and I caught the tail-end. If you’ve had similar experiences, or similar health problems, you understand the situation far better than if it had never touched your life. That applies to people you care about, too. I’m far more aware about heart trouble, now that my mom had open-heart surgery, than I ever was before. Call it empathy. (And even when I don’t agree with you — I usually do, actually — I still learn from you. Please keep writing.)
Cindy Brick recently posted…Writing A Book
K says
Yeh, this is actually pretty inaccurate. They’ve always stated that they came from middle class(and what the heck is that…!) families,that supported them greatly. They never, ever were poor! They chose to live a way of life that did represent their true financial status. They always had a financial safety net in both of their families. And yes, they are and were smart. They increasingly decided that some life choices were not aligned with who they were and that contributed to them becoming more frugal etc.
To call them poor is false and coming to that conclusion based on their “story” is one example of how “it” can be harmful.
Anon in mass
Opal says
I think that the media is imperfect– everything is–but I also think that the Frugalwoods’ nondisclosure of their finances is not the fault of the media. It’s a choice they made themselves. The bulk of what is known about them is self-published or self-written. It necessarily has to be on them.
Kat says
Like I mentioned in my comment, my biggest frustration with this kind of inspiration porn is where it gets turned into a weapon. This very common tactic of the media to hold up stories like this and say that this couple proves that people are capable of doing the same thing. Quite frankly, I think there’s enough fault to go around in this instance. Yes, the media is the one wielding the club. That being said? Financial disclosure on the part of the Frugalwoods would have helped show that they are not in a typical situation. That they started saving when they had a lower income is admirable but it isn’t unreasonable to point out that most of their success in this goal likely came from the very high paychecks they brought in later.
I will also, again, say that it is really stupid to see the “if your not making it, it’s your fault” and “you’re being entitled if you demand x,” where x can stand from anything from a living wage to being treated like a human being at work, right next to stories complaining about how millennial consumers are killing off industries that rely on discretionary spending. You have politicians blaming the financial ills of the country on the failure of millennials to buy houses or spend like their parents did but the politicians who do use that rallying cry don’t like to address the fact that this is usually due to things like stagnant wages and student debt. So, when you get a piece of inspiration porn thrown into the mix, particularly one that involves a half truth, you do get a recipe for a toxic cocktail. I think that the Frugalwoods’ book happens to be the olive in this particular cyanide martini. I’m glad that people have gotten a lot of great things out of their blog and book. That being said? I would really hope that they consider full disclosure to help curb the negatives that people have taken away.
Donna Freedman says
“Cyanide Martini” is the name of my next rock band.
Today I got a comment on my Facebook page from someone who mentioned she’d been reading me for years, beginning at MSN Money. “I read you every time I saw your writings. I felt FINALLY someone understood!”
My posting that isn’t just for reasons of self-aggrandizement, but to guess at what she meant. Everything she’d read before the Smart Spending blog said, “Do these five things and retire rich” or “Just sell off a few toys and take a second job and you’ll be in the clover in no time.”
The same kinds of things Abby read, over and over, while she waited for her medical disability case to be heard. That lack of self-awareness was what led her to start I Pick Up Pennies.
The same kind of obliviousness that leads politicians to blame the millennials for everything, or to accuse them of being entitled and lazy. So much easier to believe that everyone has the same chances in life and/or the ability to capitalize on those chances.
I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again: Not everyone starts out at the same place, and where you start too often determines where you stay. Too many PF bloggers think it was just their hard work that got them where they are. I’m not denying that some of them work hard. But sometimes hard work isn’t enough.
Personally, I think the millennials are being hosed.
Donna Freedman recently posted…Giveaway: “Frugality For Depressives.”
Prudence Debtfree says
I read your last post after reading this one, and you were very clear. Equally clear is the fact that there is a can of worms to deal with in the pf world. I think the best way forward is for people like you to continue to write authentically about all that is other than “uplifting” in life and pf. “The media’s generally superficial coverage of accomplishments” can be damaging, so it’s important to read with a critical eye to be able to pick out the fluff, glean the substance, be wary of subliminal comparison, and – in some cases – be inspired. Inspiration, after all, is not a bad thing. You, for instance, have inspired me – to a greater transparency as well as a more complete acceptance of my particular challenges. (I’m reading your book and liking it!)
Prudence Debtfree recently posted…The Awkward Question of Money Talks